Kydex Condom Holster

A high speed low drag contraceptive carrier:

Known as D.I.C.K. (Dynamic Intervention Contraceptive Karrier).  Yea that “K” is a stretch.

As manly operators we have to carry a handful of condoms in our pockets, because lets face it when it jumps off with the ladies the primary concern is to control the birth.  In hindsight pocket carry is so pedestrian; I can’t believe I never thought of this tactical solution.  My only complaint is that they don’t have a spring loaded high condom capacity magazine style holster to accommodate my needs.  I’m open to receiving one for T&E if such a design is in the works.

Available at OffTheGridConcepts in multiple colors for $20

Thoughts?

27 COMMENTS

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dave w September 13, 2012 at 12:16 am

i thought they banned ‘things that go up’ or was that just california?

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Poppy September 13, 2012 at 12:23 am

This is retarded. Are operators too cool for wallets or something?

I feel that I should accompany this comment with a comparison between dicks and guns. Like how the black ones are usually more powerful or something about how much negligent discharges suck

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dave w September 13, 2012 at 01:07 am

i will add a comment about keeping your weapon clean etc etc

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Martin September 13, 2012 at 10:01 am

I’ll add its not the size of the gun its how you use it.

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Poppy September 13, 2012 at 12:33 pm

Try storming the beaches of Normandy with a .22 Chipmunk.

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Jeep September 13, 2012 at 02:47 am

Has Buck Yeager been involved in the development of this? Because he says he’s kind of an expert in the art of measuring people’s D.I.C.K., so I figure he could be helpful there.
I definitively WON’T buy it, but I like the idea though.

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Diarrhea cha cha cha September 13, 2012 at 06:20 am

Good thing I’m not getting any tail, or I might have to consider one of these.

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D Larsen September 13, 2012 at 07:40 am

We need to donate prophylactics to the vigilant Spectre derps so they don’t reproduce. I wait the derp vigilant derp derp herp herpy herpington vigilant sphincter himself is married isn’t he? Might be too late to stop that derp reproduction but at least we can be fairly certain the wombat derp herp faggot is a virgin so we can still prevent that derp from spawning

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MrMaigo September 13, 2012 at 08:41 am

It’s not a condom magazine. Two is one, one is none.

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50CERTS September 13, 2012 at 02:59 pm

Real operators don’t use condoms. If they do there job right no one will ever know their name. Plus they always go for the head shot.

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John September 13, 2012 at 03:41 pm

Center of mass is close enough for me.

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dave w September 13, 2012 at 09:21 pm

^^^two awesome answers :)

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Church September 13, 2012 at 03:07 pm

Well no one who has commented seems to really like this idea. But I think it’s awesome and halarious!

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Bang September 13, 2012 at 04:09 pm

OTG is a joke in the local community here in San Diego.

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theforgottenman September 13, 2012 at 04:12 pm

I believe I just found a statement from Jerry Tsai in regards to this product. “Like we mentioned before, the Kydex Condom Holster is unavailable to civilians and for good reason. We all know that’s technology no civvies should ever get to lay their hands on. This is a purpose-built holster with no sporting applications to speak of. It is made to put down scumbags, and that’s it.”

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Jim P. September 13, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Don’t you mean:

Like we mentioned before, the Kydex Condom Holster is unavailable to civilians and for good reason. We all know that’s no civvies should ever get to lay. This is a purpose-built holster with no sporting applications to speak of in any hot situation. It is made to for scumbags that won’t get checked.

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theforgottenman September 14, 2012 at 06:35 pm

That was a better way of putting it. Pretty damn funny.

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brnin8r September 13, 2012 at 04:33 pm

I’m going to need this for my ‘CCW’ ;)

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Ricardo September 13, 2012 at 05:26 pm

LOL what a great invention!

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Jess Banda September 13, 2012 at 06:55 pm

Let me know when they get them in Magnum XXL size…

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Poppy September 13, 2012 at 07:46 pm

You use condoms? What a pencil dick.

I use fucking garbage bags to sheathe my meat lance.

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elephantrider September 13, 2012 at 07:51 pm

Awww…. you beat me to the punch on the Magnum XL joke.

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Saxon September 13, 2012 at 09:46 pm

A smart operator has no need for condomns, quick reproduction can be a force multiplier!
On a side note, this could have been tactically useful in Nam. For those times when the rain came out of nowhere and you needed to cover your muzzle with a rubber quickly. And of course, this would have been useful for those times when the GI’s had quality R&R with mama san.

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Arm3nian September 13, 2012 at 11:12 pm

I find this useful, I carry condoms anyway to hand it out to people who should not breed, so this would be an ideal place to keep em.

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AK™ September 14, 2012 at 04:47 am

Shouldn’t this get a letter from BATFE because it’s a suppressor carrier?
Condoms suppress the sperm..

I wonder if Sandra Fluke’s boyfriend has one…and if he does,did your tax dollars pay for it??

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MrMaigo September 14, 2012 at 09:55 am

Think it counts as body armor. In most places felons can’t have any.

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OTGhexual March 16, 2013 at 02:47 am

Thanks for the laughs fellas, for those that “get it”, its just a joke and not really meant for sale but some people order it a gag or a conversation starter.
That should be pretty obvious from the name + description.

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