Oh Glock… Ok here we go, I’m going to break down the video:
0:02 – Guy in a white utility van in a black winter hat stroking his goatee and creepin on a girl going into her house. This is already bad news because as far as I’m only rapists and plumbers own vans like that, and there was no background info about her toilet having any issues.
0:09 – Girl is now inside. We find out she’s cute and has red hair (bonus), and slipped into some booty shorts (bonus #2) and a purple little low cut number with lace trim (bonus #3)
0:11 – You’ve got to be shitting me… that looks like the R. Lee Ermey Glock “wrong diner” commercial intro
0:17 – Creeper still stroking that beard and looking creepy
0:19 – OH LAWD… it is the “wrong diner” commercial… this is starting to get lame as shit. A promo within a promo? Lets see where Glock is going to take this
0:23 – *knock* *knock* Who the hell knocks like that? I would have palmed the steel/polymer right then. She decides to get up and see who it is… sees that creepy rape van outside, gasps, but then is like “meh fuck it” and sits back down.
0:36 – Oh wait.. some acting just kicked in and now she’s acting hot and bothered.. or maybe scared, I can’t tell.
0:41 – More knocks… the knock timing wasn’t quite as creepy, but she’s naturally alarmed. She gets up anyway… look out the peep hole to see the creepy rape van but no one there.
0:51 – OH LAWD… chain wallet, beard, and now we find out he has a pony tail… some shit is going to go down. Shit always goes down when there is a chain wallet – beard – pony tail trifecta.
0:57 – She’s now scared. She heads to her bedroom… Goes under the bed and gets her gen4 compact (G19) from some lame lockbox with a not much of a code.
1:13 – Back on the couch but the Glock beside her. This is how the night should have started in my opinion, and with me there kicking that gun blog flava to her ears, but whatever… continuing on. More knocks… they are now quick and hard! She’s not impressed.
1:19 – She gets up to go to the door and sees the handle being jiggled.. backs up… steadies her gun at the door.
1:28 – Door BURSTS open… creeper is now INSIDE!
1:35 – He sees her with the gun and faints.
1:45 – He wakes up and is on a stretcher with handcuffs, and R lee Ermey (a paramedic in this case) drops the tagline. Did the guy hurt his head or something? Who really gives a shit if he did, I say. I suppose he’s there as a paramedic since they are “first responders”.
I’m really disappointed to see “Perfection” hasn’t yet transcended from firearms into promotional videos. If Glock wasn’t scared of a little controversy, I’d like to be hired to make them the most badass promo video, the world has ever seen.
Thoughts? If you have a van like that but aren’t a rapist or a plumber I’d like to hear about it in the comments as well.