Joe Biden Endorses Chocolate Shooting Guns

Double Barrel Biden is at it again, granted he was just trying to make a kid’s day:

I am sorry it took me so very long to respond to your letter. I really like your idea. If we had guns that shot chocolate, not only would out country by safer, it would be happier. People love chocolate.

You are a good boy,
Joe Biden

Joe-Biden-Chocolate-Shooting-Guns-LetterNews flash, chocolate at several thousand feet per second is still going to kill someone.  Richard Ryan?  Demolition Ranch?  Mattv2099?  Iraqveteran8888? HighJak86? and every other shooting YouTuber I frequently post… maybe a special chocolate load is in order to debunk Biden’s theory of a safer America?  Actually maybe that’s a bad idea… I’m not interested in hearing about a chocolate registry and assault chocolate on a daily basis from the media in the future. Thoughts?

Hat tip: Joshua

22 COMMENTS

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Doom Guy May 15, 2013 at 12:09 am

This kind of thing is so trite and banal it’s actually painful to witness.

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Aaargo Jay May 15, 2013 at 01:14 am

Sooooo… I thought out the whole chocolate bullet thing… Ummm, not really gonna be able to do it!! Choco-points SUCK!! I’ve tried them. (Not really but it sounded cool)

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Aaargo Jay May 15, 2013 at 02:53 am

BTW… I HATE CHOCOLATE!!

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Kevin May 15, 2013 at 03:30 am

“News flash, chocolate at several thousand feet per second is still going to kill someone” I lol’d

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SteelerFan May 15, 2013 at 04:11 am

Your barrel would be full of hersheys halfway through a mag. But at least the kid doesn’t want to take guns away. I wonder if he saw the “buy a shotgun” videos and thought “this guy definitely has enough time on his hands to write my ass a letter.”

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05RC51 May 15, 2013 at 04:20 am

8 years old and can’t read for shit……. now that’s scary

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Nick May 15, 2013 at 10:30 am

My thoughts exactly.

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Bubba May 15, 2013 at 01:08 pm

Probably because Biden can’t write print worth a damn.

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IllTemperedCur May 15, 2013 at 06:26 am

Chocolate shotgun slug into ballistic gelato……errrrr, gelatin.

Someone call the guys at Box ‘O Truth

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PhoenixNFA May 15, 2013 at 07:01 am

Hmm. If it can stay old enough in texas…..

Anyone have any load data for 158gr semi sweet jacketed milk chocolate?

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PhoenixNFA May 15, 2013 at 07:03 am

*cold.

Damn Iphone. This one is going to Richard Ryan to get a proper firing squad death by bullets.

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M May 15, 2013 at 09:39 pm

my thoughts too, a little liquid nitrogen treatment before chambering the round might get it out of the barrel if a gas check were used.. but i still doubt that it would remain hard enough to do any damage at anything but point blank range…

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mattv2099 May 15, 2013 at 07:14 am

This is one for Colion Noir.
He would start out:

“DUDE SERIOUSLY!”

And then slam the vice prez and detail why the obesity and diabetes epidemics are an order of magnitude above firearms violence.

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Quint Young May 15, 2013 at 09:17 am

Truthfully I found it middle amusing. Don’t bash the kid for being a kid. You all said stupid things when you were children and it was funny. It seems like were so quick to lash out at anti-gunners and rake then over the coals for things that we would find amusing otherwise.

If your kids said something about chocolate guns you would not respond with as much negative criticism.

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Quint Young May 16, 2013 at 12:20 am

-mildly-

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Kevin May 15, 2013 at 09:18 am

I like how the kids dad is like “My son had a brilliant idea!”

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Penny Pincher May 15, 2013 at 10:57 am

Why not go hi-caliber and shoot solid chocolate eggs out of a potato cannon? They could have more wax than regular chocolate. If they’re still too melty, put a jellybean type coating on them, or even that starchy film they put on the bottoms of lebkuchen cookies.

Actually, it might really hurt to get hit with jellybeans, too. That’s almost like rubber bullets.

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Rjackparis May 15, 2013 at 11:48 am

Hey, On the way the vice president acted on this I respect it and we all should (atleast in this act). He’s encouraging a young boy to think about ways to help stop violence as silly as the idea may be. The Boy is trying, We SHOULD NOT bash the kid on this, nor should we bash the VP for encouraging him. ( mind you not that I like or support him) The child is not really part of this political debate he’s just trying to help the adults find a solution.

Although suddenly, a nerf gun that shot chocolate sprinkles into various confectionery sounds like a delicious if not messy idea.

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Capt. Glenn May 15, 2013 at 03:44 pm

Does anyone else think the whole reason this particular letter was answered was because of its public relations value?

I mean Joe Biden’s press secretary most likely gave him the go ahead to respond to this due to the controversial nature of the subject matter. It was seen as a good move for public relations, because they knew at minimum the AP press would be picking this up.

It is really cool that the boy’s letter actually was answered, even if it were out of purely political agenda. I wonder how many other personal letters receive a hand written response from the Vice President of the United States?

The fact that the idea is rather silly it takes nothing away from the excitement for the boy and his parents.

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Jay May 15, 2013 at 08:16 pm

Yeeeah. He looks like someone from Wisconsin.

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ASM826 May 16, 2013 at 06:43 am

Push even hardened chocolate with a gas check to several thousand feet per second and the barrel is going to look like used equipment in the Hershey’s factory.

I would watch a video of testing chocolate bullets, lubed with butter, and shot at ice cream. Start at about 300 fps and work up until you see signs of chocolating in the barrel, then back off and develop an accuracy load.

Next up: A 12 ga. load using M&Ms.

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Lance May 16, 2013 at 06:56 am

Pardon me while I go find as much chocolate as I can to ram down the barrel of any or all of our firearms. Pew pew.

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