Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes – Trailer

Jumanji meets Outbreak meets 300 meets I Am Legend meets Planet Of The Apes:

dawn-of-planet-of-apes-posterMeh.. probably entertaining enough.  Looks like several sharks were jumped though.  Predictably the moral dilemma is going to be “BUT THEY ARE SO HUMAN-LIKE”.

Anyone looking forward to this?  What caliber for apes?

In theaters July 11, 2014.

12 COMMENTS

JUMP DOWN ↓ TO ADD ANOTHER

J- May 10, 2014 at 05:16 am

Sometimes a Sci-Fi movie premise is so bad, I just can suspend my disbelief long enough to sit through the trailer. This is one of those types of movies.

It is implied from the trailer that the same virus that made the apes smart, killed off the humans. The virus with the highest mortality rate is Ebola at 89-90%. If there are 360 million Americans, and 90% died, there would still be 36 million people. If we go to the unreasonably high mortality rate of 99%, there would still be 3.6 million survivors.

If were talking about the whole world, there are 7.1 billion people. A super lethal (99% mortality) virus would result in a global population of 71 million.

On the other hand, the global population of chimps is 150,000 and (critically endangered) gorillas is 5,000. In the US there are a little over 2,000 registered chimps in zoos and private facilities, and less than 900 gorillas in zoos (Lincoln Park Zoo information).

So in the whole of the US, after a viral plague, human would still out number chimps and gorillas at a rate of 3.6 to 36 million to 3,000 or between 1,200 and 12,000 to 1.

Chimps have a gestational period near that of humans 250 days for chimps 260 days for humans, and take 10 years to reach sexual maturity. There is no way in 10 years (how long the sequel takes place after the first movie) that there could be a massive army of chimps.

Finally, somehow the movie seems to forget that we humans have overwhelming technology and weapons. We nearly wiped out the ape population of the world by accident. Most of the apes featured in the movie are listed as endangered. If we humans actually put some effort into killing off apes, we could do it in about a week.

Reply

Ryan May 10, 2014 at 02:34 pm

Holy crap, I enjoyed reading your comment.

Reply

Carl May 10, 2014 at 02:37 pm

Agreed. Frick’n ill nerd breakdown!

Reply

ENDO-Mike May 10, 2014 at 02:35 pm

haha whoa you really broke it down! That’s going to be running through my head the whole time if I end up watching it.

Reply

T May 10, 2014 at 07:45 pm

Wow haha for once a serious movie breakdown I actually enjoyed!
Caliber? (under movie premise, of course) an AR in .50 Beowulf maybe? Of course, if you don’t have hordes of them as depicted, any safari-capable caliber would work I suppose…

Reply

Nathanael S. May 11, 2014 at 06:09 pm

Wow. That was actually a very well put-together comment. However, I think it was pointed out in the first movie (going off recollection from way back to the first iteration of the story) that having an ape in every household was considered hip, thus increasing the population. But, again, even though the numbers change a bit, you’re still very much correct. I never, ever thought of it that way!

Preferred caliber? I’m gonna say would be 7.62x39mm.

Reply

Carl May 10, 2014 at 05:47 am

Dude, its only a trailer. Maybe they’ll touch more on that in the movie. If not…its a movie. You know your shit though.

Reply

IllTemperedCur May 10, 2014 at 09:02 am

Seeing as the recent Red Dawn remake sucked so badly, it’ll be cool to see a new movie that deals with gorilla warfare.

Reply

Carl May 10, 2014 at 02:36 pm

Lol. That would be a good rap metaphor.

Reply

hydepark May 10, 2014 at 06:49 pm

This appears to be a modern day documentary on Detroit / Chicago / St. Louis / etc.

Joking aside I liked the first one ( and all the old school ones to boot are cool ) so I’ll definitely be watching this one. And the whole time I was watching this yesterday, I was thinking exactly like J above.

Reply

Doyletoo May 11, 2014 at 12:42 pm

Caliber for the chimps to use is first 5.56, then .30 carbine if you use the old school movies as reference…think maybe I saw a few Carl Gustaf 9mm subguns in one of the movies too

Reply

EODClass03180S May 13, 2014 at 02:08 pm

In my experience, 300 Blackout is the best caliber choice for mass Ape-slaughter. But you MUST be wearing the Costa-flavored rock tape to increase lethality. Carried, of course, in a ninjaturtle pod discreeeet backpack.

Reply

LEAVE A COMMENT:

Previous post:

Next post: