NRA Be Like Gag On Some Metaphors Suckas

OMG this is painful:

Nikki-TurpeauxI see what they are trying to do, but uggggggg.  MY BRAAAAAAINNN.

What do you think the chances are, that Nikki is a “cool mom”?  I kinda get that vibe from her.  Like she’d catch her 17 year old with that loud pack in his cargo pants when doing laundry, and not even trip.  The type to roll up to her kid’s school pistol on the hip, bumping 36 Chambers in the minivan.  The type to wear a blue turtleneck on an NRA News video, but go home and kick it in a sleeveless cut up deep-V ENDO Apparel shirt and capris, while grilling steaks in the backyard, drinking a cold one, humming “Bitches Love Sosa“.

Thoughts?  Paint some pictures for me guys… “Nikki be the type of mom to ________”


Comments

23 responses to “NRA Be Like Gag On Some Metaphors Suckas”

  1. LOOOOOOOOOL “that loud pack”.

    1. LongBeach Avatar

      What on earth is a loud pack?

      1. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=loud%20pack – your Long Beach neighbor Snoop Dogg knows all about it.

        1. ENDO-Mike Avatar

          Ahaha Yea exactly

  2. The way these “founding fathers” are being spoken about makes them seem somewhat “prophetic”… Almost as if they foresaw the future? I mean C’mon guys, it’s not like America is a shining beacon in the world, it’s just as fucked up as any other country. People are homeless, unemployed…

    What the fuck is wrong with just saying “We like guns and use them in a responsible, don’t take our fucking guns…”?

    1. ENDO-Mike Avatar

      That last paragraph truth

  3. Andy Wolf Avatar

    If she got her a treadmill for a couple weeks, she would be the kind of mom that would invite me over to dinner but end up making me breakfast

    1. Jim Jones Avatar

      ^^^Winner!^^^

    2. ENDO-Mike Avatar

      Haha

  4. “……swallow.”

  5. Nikki be the type of mom to eat a lot of cookie dough.

  6. Nikki be the type of Mom to hit me with that under the table action at a dinner party celebrating a co-workers 50th wedding anniversary at TGI Friday’s

    1. ENDO-Mike Avatar

      Sounds autobiographical! Lol

  7. Nikki be the type of mom that use too much mascara.

  8. “Nikki be the type of mom to let Daquan sleep over

    1. ENDO-Mike Avatar

      Lol amazing.. All of them.

  9. “Nikki be the type of mom to trap out da bando

  10. “Nikki be the type of mom to take one for the team

  11. “Nikki be the type of mom to sneak your pistol in the club

  12. Nikki be the type of mom

    .. to just get it on
    .. all night long
    .. till the morning dawn.

  13. first thought? “the kind of Mom I hone in on at the park”.

    but I like my women like I like my steak: thick cut, little fat on the side, and hot pink in the middle

    1. i like my women like i like my scotch, 18 years old and mixed up with coke.

      1. That’s just… wrong.

        Who’d mix 18 year old scotch with soda? >:)