Clipfort Trolls Hard And Lawmakers Lick Their Lips

Holy this thing has a lot of complex features.  Law makers are going to love it.

This thing trolls so hard, they even call it CLIPfort… not MagFort.  9/10… only because they didn’t use the word “clipazine”.  Any work they put into this product and the marketing of it was entirely ruined at 0:39 when the ENTIRE CARTRIDGE is seen leaving the barrel.  Yea we’ve seen bigger and better companies *Cough* Glock *Cough* make that mistake too, but still.

LOL 3:34 – Bluetooth, WiFi, GSM, GPS, connected to apps?… cool story, but no thanks.

3:55 – “Imagine we could prevent unauthorized use and at the same time have instant secured access to firearms”.  – Hardly “instant” when you have to fumble with swiping your finger on the bottom when someone is potentially trying to kill you.  This thing is going to kill more people than it will save.  It has been proven over and over that in a high stress situation your fine motor skills are basically non existent; END of discussion, the product can now go away.  The numerous deaths and injuries could go away if people weren’t dumbasses with how they store their guns.

Clipfort-Biometric-Magazine-LockThoughts?  What’s the obsession with making everything on earth interface with an app, and adding unnecessary complexity to it?  The main reason I like manual/automatic watches & firearms is because of their simplicity.  If the magazines on my Glocks started “crashing” and/or needing software updates, or were being annoying because my finger was dirty and not letting me in… I’d throw the towel in real quick, and walk away.  Honestly I’m surprised they didn’t troll even harder and put a retina scanner underneath the barrel… maybe that’s the 2nd product?

Gat tip: Clint, Mike


Comments

28 responses to “Clipfort Trolls Hard And Lawmakers Lick Their Lips”

  1. OMFG, this is pure gold!

    So many solutions looking for a problem…

    I hope they have thought about the case of inserting a magazine when the slide is held back… what happens when you push the slide release? Does it chamber a round anyway, or does the gun self-destructs? Or if you already have a round chambered?

    Can you give you unlocked gun to someone else? How long does the mag stays unlocked?
    And you’re right, what’s going to happen next? Your mag’s software crashes, your watch is infected by a virus, your salt mill runs out of battery, your bullets’s built-in GPS is scrambled, the smartphone controlling your front door/TV/fridge/doormat/windscreen wipers/toilet flush falls in the toilet… end of the world dude !

    1. Who would want to live in a world where your Organic Himalayan Pink Salt mill’s GPS keeps crashing anyway?

  2. some things are just better off being mechanical. they should put this on a pack of ciggs instead. im sure there are lots of situations where this would be usefull but not when your life is on the line!!!

  3. I love 0:30 – Trigger pulled: Check, Finger swiped: Check, Round through whatever is in front of me: double check.

  4. Poor California..they’ll likely be required to use this soon…or else! Otherwise, sure, let’s all have this requirement..but only after every police department test and use it so we can be assured only authorized person use it, it saves lives (especially the children), has unparalleled feeding reliably, and helps them keep their 2nd amendment rights. Should go well.

    1. anonymoose Avatar
      anonymoose

      And it has to be bullet-buttoned! And limited to 5 rounds! And only in non-scary assaulty calibers (.22 Short)!

  5. Bro-ham Avatar

    Only thing this video is missing is the temple-index. It’ll never be safe enough without a forced temple-index!

  6. Clip-Ford Avatar
    Clip-Ford

    Almost seems legit, but what if your fingertip is sweaty/bloody/dirty/gloved? Secure with a USB port? Not a chance.

    My favorite troll gems: “Personalized Ammunition”, “Tier 1”, whole cartridges coming out of glock barrels, and a low-capacity “ASSAULT RIFLE” magazine!

    I hope the clipfort only comes in 7-round NY compliant capacity.

    1. Maybe you can configure the number of rounds you can fire before the you have to swipe it, in order to unlock a secret pinhole to change the mag…

    2. derpy sir derp Avatar
      derpy sir derp

      I have biometric doors I need to go through at work and other biometric devices to start/use stuff.

      If my life depended on quickly getting through the door or getting eaten by wolves or zombies or something… I would be dead.

      This is not legit at all. Anybody that has to use fingerswipe devices can see that this thing is terrible and the people that made it know it.

  7. 1:26 on…
    “SWIPE YOU FINGER”

    What? They can’t even spell words on their simulated app screens right. Geez…

    1. What about @1:45 “…over a year between charges, based on more *THEN* 2,000 actuations.”?

  8. Stephen Avatar

    I LOLed at the retina scanner under the barrel. Problem solved.

  9. Could be an interesting thing for a competitive shooter if it could record splits and draws and stuff like that.

  10. Stuart Anderson Avatar
    Stuart Anderson

    What they’re not going to make a clipfort for HIGH-POINT?! I though the only people who said clips were the ones who are operate HIGH-POINT Firearms.

  11. jim bob Avatar

    i would shit a brick if i need to use a gun and all i got was that *buffering* circle going round and round. hold on a sec mister lethal force against me guy, my updates need to install.

  12. Anything can be hacked. Period.

    1. Robert W. Avatar
      Robert W.

      And I would be on the forefront of the hacking. If this actually comes out, I will buy a couple, then figure out how to hack them, then distribute the info as widely as possible. I will make it a goal to drive the company into non-existence.

  13. Menger40 Avatar

    Guess what? Former Secretary of Homeland Security/PA governor Tom Ridge is on the “advisory board” for this company, according to their website. He’s a gun-grabbing Republican and a former member of Everytown for Gun Safety.

  14. That key looks cool. But yeah give this to every cop in Chicago and see how that turns out.

  15. umop_3pisdn Avatar
    umop_3pisdn

    what happens when you put a regular magazine in the gun

    1. jim bob Avatar

      it explodes like if you try to use Judge Dredd’s gun.

  16. Anonymous Coward Avatar
    Anonymous Coward

    I love how every pistol they use as an example is one of the less popular models currently: P320, PX4, classic S&W Auto, P95…

    1. ENDO-Mike Avatar
      ENDO-Mike

      Some left ejecting models I didn’t know existed either! They must be special. LOL

  17. blehtastic Avatar
    blehtastic

    You know, with all this money that Bloomberg’s pumping into safe gun technology, there’s eventually going to be a development that’s actually useful for real gun owners.

    This isn’t it, but it’s gonna happen. I’m getting my Nelsonesque “HaHa” ready.

    1. ENDO-Mike Avatar
      ENDO-Mike

      LOL at the Nelsonesque “HaHa”. I sure hope they come up with something useful.

  18. Dem overdubs tho… just needs more pew pew and it’s perfect.

  19. Available for popular handguns, like glock, and pink glock