Sheepdog Fan Fiction – Kyle Loves Tread

I looked at this pic, and almost immediately created this Sheepdog fan fiction you can read below:

Kyle pulled into the parking lot of the Best Western PLUS, making a hard left then pounding the gas pedal once; making the nearly bald tires on the Crew Cab Dodge Ram 1500 4×4 chirp loudly. Coming to an abrupt stop under the awning at the entrance, Kyle carelessly flung his door open hitting the shuttle bus next to him. He hopped out, both of his Coyote colored 5.11 combat boots hitting the ground at the same time; slamming the Ram door closed with such force it’s incredible the window didn’t shatter. This got the attention of a weathered looking lady chain smoking on the bench at his 2:00. As Kyle squeezed his girthy midsection between his truck and the bus, he glanced over at the woman and their eyes met. “The BW PLUS amirite? *rubbing his fingers together to represent big money* Not that broke regular BW shit.” he commented, impressing her with his wit. She laughed and started to reply after finishing a massive drag of her cigarette, but was interrupted by a coughing fit followed by the need to snort and spit a viscous red, grey, and green mixture of fluids on the ground as Kyle walked past her towards the hotel entrance. Realizing she was actually younger than he originally thought; “that’s a baaaaaaadd woman”, Kyle said quietly to himself as the two automatic doors sensed his presence and opened wide.

Once inside the maroon and dark wood lobby, he was greeted by a female staff member. “Checking in sir?” she said in a cheerful tone. “YUP” Kyle replied as he approached her, fumbling through his left cargo pocket. He fished around amongst the dip container, keys, flashlight, extra Ruger magazine, custom handkerchief, knucks, lighter, pen, multitool, paracord monkeyfist, cell phone, and folding knife until finally locating his RFID blocking custom EDC wallet containing his ID and credit card. It was one of those complicated wallets with bungee cords and multiple pieces, which ended up being a big production every time it was opened… Kyle loved it though. As he flipped the one retaining bungee cord off of its notch to deploy the cards, the BW girl caught a glimpse of one of his forearm tattoos. “Mow-lawn-lay-bee? Is that how you say it? That’s one of those Conservative gun things?” she asked. “Mow-lawn-law-bay… come and take them. It’s from that movie 300.” he replied, his face lighting up. “ …and yea I’ve been known to put booger hook to bang switch occasionally.” he said modestly while smirking. “We have CNN on all day here… what do you think about Trump’s new comment on silencers?” she asked. Impressed that this girl seemed to be an ally, Kyle was more than happy to talk shop with her. “Honestly, I ain’t too worried about it… Trump man… My president knows things we don’t. I trust the guy.” he said as he took a deep breath and adjusted to a more authoritative body posture. “Look, I have lotsa silencers” he continued… “but I never wore ear plugs for shooting before I had them, and I can hear fine. If they give me what I paid, for what I got.. then yea I’ll give em back. Won’t affect me none. I’ll keep on shooting. I just worry about the neighbors waking up ahhaha” he laughed. “Oh ok, good to hear sir. Anyways, your room is ready… it’s by the pool #762, down the hallway past the ice machine, then on your left. Enjoy your stay.” “Whut? I’m sorry I couldn’t hear what you said Miss, can you repeat that?” Kyle asked. She repeated the room number and directions loudly back to him in the quiet empty lobby. “762, hell yea thank you. Catch you in Valhalla. I’ll go move my truck” he said nodding once politely, then pivoting on his right foot 180 degrees surprisingly quickly before making his way back towards his parked truck.


Thoughts? 😂




Older post:

Newer post: