Slappy McSlapperson is back at it:
Wow, I get to do a second Guided Chaos post within the timespan of less than a month? Truly blessed.😂. Everyone needs supportive friends like that guy has. You just know that in their heads they are like 💭 “He really thinks this is working, so I’ll play along… but I could drop him in a heartbeat”.
Thoughts?
COMMENThaha this guy is still at it:
Jokes aside, I have to respect the hustle. I blogged about this dude in 2014 (Sometimes His Mom Lets Him Train), and 2015 (Guided Chaos Is Back With A Combatives DVD). 7 years (almost to the day) later, he’s still guiding chaos. *chef’s kiss*. Those two posts I linked by the way, are some classic ENDO. I was truly on my bullshit back then just as much, if not more, than I am now. You love to see it.
Just in case you didn’t click through, here’s the promo video from the 2nd post:
WILD 😂. Should honestly be a seizure / heart problems warning on that video. I’m in good health, and after watching it I felt like I drank 3 Venti iced Americanos.
Thoughts?
COMMENTPure gold. I’ve NEVER seen chaos so guided *tear rolls down cheek*:
If you remember my first post on Guided Chaos titled “Sometimes His Mom Lets Him Train“, the video was a pure train wreck. Obviously as you can see they didn’t take the criticism constructively, instead they made that video private (standard move).
In the above video there are a lot of fancy, low impact looking quick moves. My gut instinct tells me that would work like bullshit in real life, but what do I know?
0:05 – These quick air moves will at least let your attacker know you’re batshit crazy. Probably not a bad psychological maneuver actually. I’d recommend reaching down your pants and pulling poop out though pre-jazz hands, just to up the ante.
0:20 – A LOT of jostling in this video, and slaps and yells at “attackers” which are calmly swaying back and forth.
0:27 – Yesssssss. I knew disarms were coming. So legit guys. Take notes.
0:33 – All killer no filler.
0:35 – Those slaps tho…
0:43 – Whoa I thought for a second here the Chaos was going off the rails for a sec… but then I was like “nope…. nope… I see you brAh my bad, it’s guided”.
I think this guy must have attended the Guided Chaos school for CQC:
Get some more Guided Chaos over at their website Attack Proof, and find out where you can train with them.
I’m still not entirely sure this isn’t all a big joke, and these guys are the master trolls of the close quarters combat world.
Thoughts? Would train with? Would at least *doosh doosh* *doosh doosh* with?
OMG “Guided Chaos” guys look:
The script would read “Opening scene, we see the shooter on an indoor range which looks a lot like John Wayne Gacy’s basement”.
0:26 – Balance training always comes in handy. Personally I train on log roll though…. having it spin you around and dunk you is some bullshit, be prepared.
0:39 – Awwwwwww shit the old “No-Look/Switch Hand /Moving/Point Shoot” such a classic. You can tell him and his buddies made this shit up just to be like “HELL YEA WE OPERATE HARD BRO!”
1:00 – PURE CHAOS guys… pure uncut chaos. MY MIND WAS LIKE *KABOOM*
1:09 – I wonder what being a “Guided Chaos Jostler” pays? Do they have another opening? Is there an application / interview? “Where have you jostled in the past?” “Are you comfortable jostling in all types of environments, disruptive ones even?” “Ever run into any issues in a jostle? If so how did you solve them?” “Where or who do you see yourself jostling in 10 years?”
1:29 – He trains like he’s on the school yard, and those five dummies are bullies who want to give him an atomic wedgie.
1:44 – He’s in full flashback mode here. His mom warned him about this type of training brining up old thoughts of the past. Hear his primal UHHHhhgggggggg uHhhHHGGGGGGAaAAHHhhhhhh.
Get some more Guided Chaos over at their website Attack Proof, and find out where you can train with them. I know your mom and his mom will be besties. After your 2nd training session they’ll even collaborate and your mom might make cookies and his might make little triangle cut sandwiches with the crust removed.
Thoughts? I bet he’s asked his mom so many times if he could get the Guided Chaos logo tattooed on his lower back. She keeps saying no.
Hat tip: Caleb
