Train Like You’re Justin Bieber Getting Mobbed By Girls

Interference / distraction drills are so hot right now:

I don’t know what gentle jostling like this is supposed to simulate, a strong breeze?  “Oh shit gotta engage tangos and the wind is picking up, thankfully I trained for this type of thing.”

1:44 – WHOA WHOA WHOA who the hell is shooting that berm?  Wheelchair guy with the Tavor from 1:30?  NOT COOL.  Oh 360 training you say?  Alright brah train on.

Here’s another example from them… Art of the surprise jostle:

If I’ve learned anything from the internet, I know those chemtrails in an otherwise blue sky are having an effect on the training in some way.  Possibly the government making the jostles weaker than they otherwise would have been, just to keep the upper hand.   Additionally the shooters isosceles stance is an obvious illuminati homage.

chappelle-princeKenaz Tactical Group is the plug for jostle on jostle training.

Thoughts?

Gat tip: nouno

11 COMMENTS

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Jeep February 5, 2015 at 02:29 am

You gotta admit, a guy in a wheelchair with a Tavor, standing right behind you the whole time is disorienting.
I’d be rather disturbed in this situation.

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Shrimp February 5, 2015 at 07:10 am

A guy in a wheelchair… standing… Was that on purpose? Either way, it made me smile, so wtf is wrong with me?

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Jeep February 5, 2015 at 08:39 am

I thought about it when I wrote it, and decided to leave it anyway. Good I made someone smile today !

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overkill556x45 February 5, 2015 at 05:08 am

My tactical school that doesn’t exist will replace gentle jostling with PT. It’s a lot more realistic and distracting to shoot after 50 burpees and 10 minutes of rifle pt. Unfortunately most tac school students would have a heart attack after one burpee due to their steady diet of Code Red and Cheetos.

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Shrimp February 5, 2015 at 07:25 am

You (and this video) have convinced me that I should open my own school. But Shrimp, people will say, you have NO EXPERIENCE, and NOTHING TO OFFER. And I’ll say, yes that’s true, but I can offer a school with something unique and edgy and that has never been done before. I’ll have people dressed alternatively in clown outfits and ballerina tutus throw raw fish and shout expletives at the students from above as they run through the course–sort of like any Japanese game show that makes it to Youtube. Maybe we can offer a separate course where we team up up Master Dave (or whatever his name is) and teach mad ninja skillz while shooting blowguns and wildly swing katanas at apples. It’ll be great.

All five people who attend will rave wildly about the skillz they learned and how it helped them overcome some sort of derp, plus, free seafood buffet when were done! (Don’t mind the sand.) This is gonna be huge.

In all seriousness, regarding the video above, I can only imagine this particular “skill-set” applying to one group of people–bodyguards. Outside of personal bodyguards, I just can’t imagine this being used by anyone. Maybe Matt from Straight Forward in a Crooked World can weigh in on the subject.

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JP February 5, 2015 at 08:51 am

Try peeps and cola

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JohnnyIShootStuff February 5, 2015 at 08:31 am

Great. Another McDojo school of tactical foolery.

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Jeep February 5, 2015 at 08:40 am

At least they have a decent shooting place. Nice berm guys !

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Sheepdog6 February 5, 2015 at 07:09 pm

I’ll be the guy. Queues are lines for people to wait in…cues are instructions or directions for people to follow. DAMN AUTOCORRECT!!!!

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Stephen February 6, 2015 at 10:57 am

In the first video, I understand that it might simulate shooting amongst a crowd but the 1.44 part when someone shot the berm would have pissed me off. It was obviously not planned and that is when people get hurt or worse.

I’m kind of surprised because the vids from Kenaz in the past were pretty good (working the basics of pistol and carbine).

oh well – I just hope they discontinue this crap.

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ASM826 February 7, 2015 at 07:47 pm

Hit the shooter across the shins with a 2×2, then press the start buzzer. While he’s shooting, throw folding chairs at him. Randomly throw flash bangs down range. Run the whole thing with police sirens at full volume.

“Gentle jostling?” Why bother?

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